It’s about Self Control – Temperance

Temperance 11-17A little word that can cause quite a bit of damage all by itself: control.  I want to take it a bit farther, people, I have to bring it to the specific.  I am talking about self-control or temperance.  What a difficult thing to do when we are in situations where we are sucked into situations where our very core is insulted!

So I have to be real again with you about this one.  The older I get, the more I find reasons to let go of certain people and situations.  Yes, I get tired too of the drama and the sensationalism that goes on. I don’t want any part of it.  

In order for me to keep my peace, I have had to make a lot of changes to improve my reaction to things.  You will not imagine how important it is for you to take the time to evaluate things before reacting to them!

Every time I skip the self-control step, something goes array.  It is not easy to do, I know…  But just like exercise, I found that the more I practice temperance, the more developed that skill gets.

In a time where everything is quick and not fast enough, we tend to not take the time to think before we act.  Self-control, temperance, is a very tough act to put up and there we have to keep up with practicing it.  When you stop working on temperance, it gets immediately replaced by the “shooting from the hip” syndrome.  Can anybody relate to this?  I sure can!

Here are two things I found to key in keeping my self-control:

  • Noticing my emotions.  When I get really excited or very upset, I tend to react right away.  I noticed that those are the times when I tend to just jump into things and can make some pretty crappy mistakes.  This awareness takes time to cultivate.  When you realize that those feelings are coming, the little bell inside rings.  You know then that a moment for practicing temperance is here.
  • Retreat and Process.  Sometimes, things get out of hand rapidly.  For me, what has worked well, is to take the time to be alone and process the situation.  Yes, this is a tough one too, but not impossible.  Let people around you know that you need some time to process.  That way you give yourself permission to take some time out to get things into perspective.  This always works well for me.  It tends to make some people uncomfortable because most of them want to get to things “right now.”  They don’t like to be deprived of the immediacy of your reaction.  

I don’t expect anybody to be an expert at self-control at all times right away, however, practicing temperance has been a lifesaver for me in many situations.  

Remember that it takes practice and also that you have to be kind and compassionate with yourself as you learn this skill.  People who do not understand your self-control will try to push your buttons and will even succeed at times.  But your Peace is priceless and invaluable.  Seek it and keep it at all costs.  You are worth it!  In the meantime, HERE are some tips to get some Peace flowing into you to optimize your self-control exercises 🙂

Keep the Faith always,

M

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